Eternal Patch Day of the Restless Soul

Anyone who’s worked in the MMO industry knows the feeling of impending doom that comes with any patch day. Sitting there as the servers are brought down, butt cheeks clenched, all fingers and toes crossed with the still warm body of the chicken you’ve just sacrificed to the ubiquetous Server Gods laying next to your desk in the chalk outlined ceremonial circle.

In my previous life as a player, I used to look forward to patch days as if they were some kind of mini holiday. New stuff! New content! New balance changes! New! New! New! I suppose the feeling of “newness” is still there to an extent, but only to a lesser degree.

We spend weeks upon weeks putting all of this work into patches. As such, one would think that I would be viewing a patch day as a lover views the moment of climax…a joyful culmination of all of our collected efforts. Instead, patch day has become associated with long hours, scouring the message boards for bugs and saying collective prayers that nothing breaks to much.

Oh Noes! It's a Patch!

Oh Noes! It's a Patch!

A successful patch, and successful is a relative term, seems to be like a rogue tornado. You unleash a mighty storm of content and change and pray to god there’s no small midwestern town in its path. Invariabley it will take out a trailer park or two along the way, however these are minor collateral losses and things that you come to expect when dealing with a force of nature.

My apologies to any trailer park dwellers.


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